Hey hey hey! It's me! Your friend. Your pal. Your henchman. Your confidant. That guy you know from real life. The guy who's opinion you value most. Which is why I am bringing you my top ten lists. Naturally I should start with something non controversial. Pizza. If you read my list and somehow disagree, please leave a comment in the section, and we will follow up with a duel at dawn. Your choice of duel. Pistols, swords, family feud (must bring own family), Pictionary, master chef off, you get the idea. We duel. To. The. Death.
Once my wife and I were visiting my mother-in-law and she made us home made pizza. It was soooooo good. I am not going to review home made pizza, because a. it is often better, b. some people are way too snobbish about it. "I only like our home made pizza, won't eat anything else. etc." I have a different philosophy when it comes to pizza, all pizza is good in it's own way. Maybe it's actually terrible and it's only good for playing frisbee in the parking lot, but you know, good in it's own way. Truly though, the vast majority of pizza is made to a decent standard and there's something good about it. When my brother-in-law came down the stairs to have that amazing homemade pizza, when asked if he wanted any, he said "pizza is pizza" and I cannot think of a time in my life where I was more offended. It was the first real moment in my life that I understood cancel culture. I mostly jest.
Well, let's get into it. I don't feel the need to be very scientific about this, I'll rank them 1 -10, give them a write up of why they are there, and then I'll give them points or something, and recommend a pizza off the menu. Also, this list will rely heavily on pizza I can remember and think you will know with a couple exceptions.
10. Pizza 73
Coming in at number 10, a pizza place. A classic 2 - 1 pizza place that started up in Edmonton Alberta. They've master efficiency and something that when it's fresh is generally better than frozen pizza. Where they shine is actually for their wings, taste wise. They provide good value price wise. Fun fact, when I was a kid in the 90's they had a competitor in Grande Prairie called Pizza 77 with same art style and everything, and I could not have told you which was the chain.
Rating: Consistent and edible, I give them a 'P' for pizza.
Menu recommendation: Wings, or eating somewhere else if they're open.
9. Subway
True story, around 5 or so years ago, Subway added personal pizza's to their menu's in some stores. They're alright, it's a normal pizza with a couple toppings added out of the sub bin and warmed up in the mega oven thing that heats things super fast. Then my friend Stephen and I were on a road trip and we walked into the Valleyview subway and he tried to order a pizza from them, but this was one of those subways that did not have pizza. When he ordered it they just looked at him like "This is a sub place, why are you trying to order pizza?" and that seems like a perfect slam on why they should not have had pizza on the menu.
Rating: I'll give it an 'S' for sandwich shop pretending to be a pizza place.
Menu recommendation: A sub. A pizza sub?
8. Dominos
Dominos has really rehabbed their image since I started eating it about 17 years ago when my Uncle Buddy was living in a condo with a dominos just outside of it. They even ran an ad campaign about how everyone thought their pizza was tasteless sauce and cheese slathered onto an actual piece of cardboard. They were like "Our Pizza Sucks!" The great thing about dominos is its cheap and they give good deals. So good that one time they gave me $20 to eat their pizza. A few years ago on my friends instagram, they told everyone in a friend group to bring their favourite pizza over for a party, and in the pic were two different boxes for Domino's. Have they tried anywhere else? It's a decent pizza, but how it could ever land in anyone's number 1 slot is beyond me. I will say this for them though, they have my favourite branding a box art of any company I have eaten at.
Rating: 3 stickers from the teacher for being good and average.
Menu Recommendation: Your 3 favourite toppings on a large pizza for $9 or whatever insane deal they have going on.
7. Twister's/Buster's Pizza
I do not know the full story here, but in Grande Prairie the Buster's one day was suddenly Twister's. Having lived other places, the menu's are still basically the same and so is the pizza's when you order it. Another 2 for 1 place with good prices, plus access to donairs! But you're not here for donairs, you are here for pizza. Honestly, I could pass on about 85% of this menu. But it has one of my top three pizza's ever. The donair pizza with Tzatziki sauce. My wife and I love it, and they are the only people that make a donair pizza the exact way they do. Sauce, donair meat, onions, cheese, delicious. It's the reason for me to eat there.
Rating: I'll give it a rating of 'Boss' for every time the guy with lots of arm hair and gold chains said "What can I get you, boss?" every time I went in there for the last decade.
true story, I had about 10 boxes and friends over for my birthday, and on the side of the box, the slogan is “We cure hunger!” And my friend Stephen Plant turned to my buddy Cody (who reminded me to add this) and he said “wow, we should send these guys over seas!” And it really cracked us up.
Menu Recommendation: Obviously, the Donair pizza, but the barbecue chicken is also pretty tasty. There is also another 2 for 1 pizza place called Pizza Plus one building to the west and takes less than a minute to walk to, with virtually the same menu and quality, but has a great Alfredo pizza on as well.
6. Pizza Hut
Here's the thing about Pizza Hut, it is greasy, it is cheesy, there is nothing all the memorable about it's sauce, but who else makes pizza like Pizza Hut? I submit to you that no one does. Add in their cheese crusts, and you have a unique combination that at the very least separates them from their competition. Also, due to that grease, I maintain that no pizza reheats better the second day than Pizza Hut.
Rating: I'll give them the "Eric Carmen" rating for his song, "All By Myself"
Menu Recommendation: Your favourite pizza toppings with the cheese crust, baby! Or if you feel like shortening your life, try a P'zone, which is a name brand calzone.
Here's Pizza the Hutt from Spaceball's. What an awful yet funny thing.
Interlude, my wife and I, we love pizza. We keep coming back to it. One time when I was courting her, I went to visit her in Calgary. We stopped in at a random pizza joint downtown. Pizza was delicious. We held hands as we waited for the pizza to come, looking longingly into each others eyes, sharing deep romantic things with each other, when a woman who has surely had a tough life came in and saw us. She proceeded to interrupt us, and tell us how wonderful young love was, and how she remembered those days. She was evidently known to the guys behind the counter, as security came to make her leave, she left us with these parting words that we have never forgotten, "don't get hooked on drugs and alcohol." Anyways, the magic moment we were having was over. Back to my list!
5. Royal Pizza
This is an Edmonton chain as well that is still growing, to my knowledge. They have a good taste, lots of variety on the menu, and they are just all around consistent. I also feel like they could represent a lot of local pizza places in your area. Lot's of good toppings, good coverage of the dough. You get your money's worth here.
Rating: Homely? Home-ish? Home? It's good pizza.
Menu Recommendation: They have something called The Boss Has Gone Mad where it's simply spaghetti on pizza. It will not blow you away, but it is a fun pizza to have once.
4. Papa Murphy's
Back to my uncle Buddy, he told me that he went to Papa Murphy's and when they explained to him that he would have to take a cold pizza home and bake it himself, he said no thanks, he was not going to pay anyone for him to make his own supper. Which I respect and understand, but holy smokes do they send you home with good pizza's! They also have these deluxe pies that come with crust on the top too! Like a normal pie! When I was growing up, mom would take us to Costco, and they had these things called Chicken Bakes, they were basically chicken ranch calzones. I miss them. But if you get the deluxe chicken ranch pizza at Papa Murphy's it is basically the same thing! Or you can get something else. The point is Papa John has nothing on Papa Murphy (I thought they were the same thing for a while).
Rating: Take n' Bake? More like Shake and Bake! Cause it's so good! You'll Shake!
Menu Recommendation: You know what I think.
3. Boston Pizza
These guys do deluxe pizza really well. They are also the third pizza joint on this list to be started in Edmonton. They also have my second favourite logo behind Domino's. From their classics to some of the fun stuff they have rotated through the menu, like the Thanksgiving pizza which had turkey, stuffing, and cranberry sauce. I was convinced it would be like when they made the pizza burger, which was too wonderful things coming together to make something average, but no, the Thanksgiving pizza was delicious. I would eat it again. Also, they are on the pricy side, so that part is sad.
Rating: Canadian Classic, tried tested and true. Built Ford Tough. I dunno. Good.
Menu Recommendation: The pierogi pizza is one of the most unique pizza's that I have never seen adequately reproduced anywhere else. Every other attempt is just a pale imitation. But you can also do the Tropical Chicken, it's an Alfredo chicken pizza with pineapple, although I usually order it without the pineapple. Does pineapple belong on a pizza? Depends if that's the way you like eating pizza. Simple as that. Do not address this argument with me again. Boston Royal is good, and my wife loves the Great White North, which is the greatest name you will find for something as simple as a ham and cheese pizza. Like calling buttered toast The Mega Lighting Sandwich.
2. Flying J Pizza/The Shell Gas Station's
One time I walked into a shell gas station in Rycroft AB, and they had pizza spinning around. These slices had huge crusts on them and they came in about four classic flavours. I bought two slices and holy smokes, I have hardly ever been able to pass Rycroft without grabbing a slice of gas station pizza. No other gas station compares. The fluffy crusts were like biting into soft garlic knots, the dough was fresh, the sauce was good. Delectable. I thought maybe this was just one gas station, but it turned out I could find this pizza at any Flying J truck stop. I maintain that the Rycroft crew does the best with the recipe though.
Rating: Gas and Pizza, one stop shopping! Phenomenal pizza.
Menu Recommendation: Two slices of whatever is freshest, or order a whole pie! Small selection, just the classics plus BBQ Chicken that I can recall.
1. Panago
If you are going to drop $30 a large pizza, this is the place to do it. Originally branded as Panagopoulos Pizza, they changed it for some reason. Grande Prairie's first Panago was in the building that the Domino's is in now (When my wife and I drive around GP I always tell her what building's used to be. I assume she finds it incredibly charming). This pizza comes with great crust, great sauce, great ingredients, a great selection of recipe's, and what I consider their crown jewel, jalapeño ranch sauce, which just so happens to be featured on my favourite of all time pizza's, the Chicken Club Pizza. But I enjoy pretty much anything I have ever had there, and recommend this also Canadian Franchise as my number one! I also remember visiting Prince George one time, and we called for them to bring pizza to our campground, but the call centre saw a GP number and sent that pizza somewhere in Grande Prairie instead. One funny miss in many successful and happy orders. Now in Claremont AB, there is also a Panago in a Shell (Not a flying J stop) gas station that does pizza by the slice! So you can have Panago for cheap!
Rating: It's the <whoever you think is the greatest athlete/musician/etc. of all time> of pizza places!
Recommendation: The Chicken club. Oh man. Jalapeño ranch sauce, chicken, bacon, sun-dried tomatoes, and ham. Especially with extra JR Sauce to dip it in. So good. Even my plain pizza loving wife enjoys it! Or do a New York Deli. Also good.
And that is my top ten! Feel free to leave me a comment telling me I am right in the section below! Disown me if you think I am wrong, whatever. If you stuck out the whole article, thanks! I hope we can talk about our love of pizza some time! And let me know if there are some other great places I need to try!
P.S. Papa John's is basically dominos, and Firecrust/Famoso are not that great unless you just feel like trying something different! Ramona's was a place getting traction in Grande Prairie as well, but I have not had a slice in quite a while.
P.S.S, I believe my friend Sam is right, I need to add Little Cesars is worth a mention. I'll even put it in his words, "...Would’ve liked a little Caesars shoutout for their cardboard pizza at unbeatable prices, and that their crazy bread is best." It's a great bachelor or lunch pizza.
P.S.S.S, my other friend Sam reminded me there are lots of cool cars outside Twisters.
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